SO EMBRACE IT

So to sum up my week, here is my email to President...

"What an INCREDIBLE week.

I love being a missionary. I don't know what else to say.

President!! These people are incredible. The amount of passion I see in the members here for the salvation of souls makes me so excited!! It's seriously contagious. We have a miracle story with our investigator Sister นิด. She accepted a baptismal date yesterday, and we are so excited for her! First dater of the transfer. It was crazy because she was on the verge of being dropped, because she wasn't progressing, but we still decided to try to invite her to Book of Mormon class this last Friday. She had stood up our last 4 appointments so we were figuring it was near the end. But this last ditch effort to invite her to come to BOM class worked!! She showed up and proceeded to sit through the most spiritually led BOM class we have ever had. At the end of the class, she told us that she has NEVER had a desire to read a book in her life, but that during this class she felt this type of urgency to read the BOM to the end. And that if she read it, her life would get so much better. These are her words not mine. I was so impressed. I felt the spirit so strong testify to me again of the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon. It made me so excited. Then she finally came to church for the first time this last Sunday! Normally she would say she would goto church and not make it because she would sleep in. But this time she GOT UP and came! Stayed all 3 hours, and learned with us after. What I can't believe is that this small change in this beautiful daughter of God's life has given me more happiness than making the game winning shot in a basketball game could ever make me. SERIOUSLY. I didn't know you could feel like kind of happiness. I love this Sister so much PRESIDENT! :) How is that even possible. I barely met her and I can't even speak her language. 555 She's still pretty timid and scared, but I am so ready to be there for her in EVERY aspect of her conversion. I love her.

Thank you for your example, and for your diligence!! 

Sister Burbank"

Love is a powerful emotion. So much more powerful than fear. Which my mission has been full of. But I think now, I can truly understand the meaning of Moroni 8:16. Perfect love (the love of Jesus Christ) literally casteth out all fear. I feel unstoppable. Everyday is just bliss. Sister Ong is my STL and yesterday she asked each companionship to share one thing that they are afraid of as a missionary, and I honestly couldn't think of a single thing. I am not afraid of the future. I am not insecure. I am not wallowing in my mistakes. I simply get back up and try again every time I fall short of perfection. And THAT is the beauty of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I still make mistakes. I still have weaknesses, but I am not afraid of them. I am GRATEFUL for them. Just like Ether 12:27. I have weaknesses to keep me humble. Which is a BLESSING. Being humbled is such a blessing to me. It's not an insecure feeling, it is a "grateful" feeling. It reminds me again of how dependent I really am on the Grace of my Savior, Jesus Christ.

SO EMBRACE IT. Embrace the Awkward. Embrace the Ridicule. Embrace the exhaustion and the pain and the disappointments. Because every single time you fall, CHRIST is there to lift you. Literally EVERY SINGLE TIME. I love my Savior. I have so much faith in this plan of redemption its pretty much impossible to fathom. How lucky are we that we have been brought to the knowledge of our Savior? Life is good. I don't know what else to say. I feel like my future is bright, and no matter how much pain and struggles I have on this mission, that will always be true. Because the future is bright for EVERYONE who trusts in their Heavenly Fathers plan for them. Just OBEY.

จบ

Love you all! 

Sister Burbank

P.S. I feel like my new motto for my mission now is "Just Embrace It"

Pictures:

New Fridge!! Seriously had to keep all our food at the Elders apt. the last few days. So nice to finally have a fridge. Unfortunately the only color they had was orange. So how our Blue and Orange apt looks like a Popsicle stand. But at least it brightens up my day everytime I walk in. 555

Brother Soo and Sister แนน I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. They acted like companions that day and taught us the POS, got to love RC'S. 

 I LOVE THE NELSONS. Little piece of home. Sorry I didn't get pictures with the Almonds. I ate them all too fast. Literally...Im not even joking.

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Clothes hanging to dry.

Bangkok apartment

Elders balcony below

View from our Bangkok apartment

This week was so incredible. I love this new area!!

This week was so incredible. I love this new area!! 

Who would've thought that I would actually love serving in Bangkok.

There are so many people to talk to, and as much as I love biking. Walking has been a really nice change of pace.

Sister Hayes and I moved into our house finally this week too! No more hotel. I will have to send pictures of our little apartment next week. It's so adorable.

This week was full of just getting to know more members. I feel like we finally know enough people that we can really start working! Which is the best feeling. An equally good feeling is EATING, gosh I love eating. One of the highlights of this week was eating Issan from this amazing place by the church, and pigging out at a Sushi buffet with Hayes. We both are obsessed with Sushi, which is going to make this transfer 100 times better. Last Monday for Pday we went to a crocodile zoo with the Elders. First district picture we took there. Elder Williams is our DL, from Idaho Falls, and we finish our missions the same day. Then Elder Purser, from Utah, is my Phii from the MTC. Meaning he is one transfer ahead of me in the mission. So I met him in the MTC. They are hard workers and we just have a lot of fun together. 

One of the spiritual highlights of the week was this last Sunday. Because we had so many appointments after church, Sister Hayes and I went on splits. I went with Sister Faa to a recent converts house, and Sister Hayes went with another member to visit a RC's sick non member father. It was so nice to get to know Sister Faa better, and honestly it made me think back to the time I went on splits with the missionaries before my mission. It's SO weird being on the other end of things now, but so interesting to see how much I have grown since then. Sister Faa is preparing for a mission right now, and honestly she is going to be an incredible missionary. She just gets it, she has so much faith, and we just get a long so well. It was perfect to have her go with me to teach Sister Tanaphon because this last week Sister Tanaphon has been really struggling with the stresses of being a new member of the church. She got baptized just this last month, and is having doubts if she made the right decision. As Sister Faa and I testified to her that she did make the right decision, and testified of the Restoration and Joseph Smith, I felt my own testimony become strengthened. It made me realize how important baring our testimony is. Sister Tanaphon then expressed how grateful she was that we came over and how it helped her feel at peace again about her decision. Satan is so real, but no one can deny that tender confirmation from that spirit that "YES" this is all true.  

Sister Hayes and I then had a discussion this morning about our lives, and how we came to receive the testimony that we now have. We realized that for both of us, it came when we started baring it more and more often. That is why we grow so much as missionaries because we are literally called to bare testimony every single day! No wonder missionaries come home so spiritually strengthened. The biggest miracle is that you don't have to go on a mission to receive the spiritual confirmations that missionaries receive. It helps a TON, but honestly the simple recipe for gaining a testimony is what we missionaries teach everyday. However, in reality it's not something you can teach at all. As missionaries, we are just people who introduce to other people HOW to gain a witness for yourself. That's all. We can't force anyone to believe what we say, but we can bare testimony of how we came to believe. And it's in that baring of your own testimony that you strengthen it. You feel the spirit testify to you again that what you believe is true, and it feels SO GOOD. We are all on the same path! Missionaries try to teach others to bare their testimony by baring their own testimony and then we are all edified and lifted and happy together in Christ. Isn't this gospel AWESOME?! Being a missionary is the coolest thing in the world.

Hope you are all doing great. Love from Thailand! 

Sister Burbank

Sushi Buffet

Crocodile Park

RS activity

Greatest Sunday School teacher

Elder Holland came and MOVING to Bangkok

Elder Holland was absolutely incredible. Shaking his hand was even cooler. 555

One of the highlights of my entire mission. 

This mission means everything to me and it has in no where been picture perfect. I understand what it means now to struggle. Missions aren't supposed to go smoothly. They are supposed to be hard, because it's only through the trials that we will truly become converted. 

"This is NOT a cunningly devised fable."

I loved when he said that because so many people try to just easily shake this whole thing off as just wishful thinking and just false. But what Elder Holland emphasized is that the sacrifices made by many for this gospel are TOO great for it to just be a devised fable. THIS IS GOD'S TRUTH. Not just some make belief bed time story. He also emphasized that "He HAS been our age, and we haven't been his" so trust him. He also paid a really great tribute to the 2 Apostles that recently passed. Saying that "don't go telling them that this was all a cunningly devised fable" because this meant EVERYTHING to their whole lives. And Holland reiterated that it means everything to his as well. I can't explain in full detail just how I feel, but just know that I believe the declaration made by Mormon in 3 Nephi 5:13 - "Behold, I am a disciple of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, I have been called of him to declare his word among his people, that they might have everlasting life." Also, I am never going to be the same. I can't be the same. I am changed for the better and I am never going back.

Ever upward.

I know this is true. 

Just a few thoughts from Holland before I get started on this week. Feels like one of the longest weeks of my life, but so perfect and necessary. 

SO I FINALLY MOVED!!! 

I am now serving in Srinakharin! Which is in Bangkok. Yes. And my companion is Sister Hayes!!!!! She is from Rexburg, Idaho and her parents are currently serving as mission presidents in Costa Rica! She has 9 siblings in her family and I seriously LOVE HER! I can't even explain how great the last 3 days have been. She is from Sister Anderson's MTC group! :) 

We have been living in a hotel because Sisters haven't served in this area for over a year and a half so Sister Hayes and I are opening it! So we still don't have a house but that's fine because we are never home anyways. Our first day we met one of the sweetest ladies EVER. Her name is แม่ Nong. She was the on RS Pres, but now she is just a counselor in the RS presidency but she is so involved in the church it's insane. She was excited to get Sisters serving here. They have been wanting Sisters back for a while. 

Saturday was so great. We had a Stake Sports day, which was a lot of fun. So many members went! It was awesome. Got to meet a bunch of members from all the other areas in the Stake and it was just cool to see how many people were there! 

Sunday was amazing too. Church was so great, and we also got to go visit S. แนน (19 yr. old strong member) and her dad who isn't a member. Apparently, the Elders have been trying to meet him for a while because he is never home, but today we just randomly stopped by her house to meet her LA mom and her dad was there!! He said he normally isn't there but today he randomly had a day off. It was so cool, so we got to pray and read with them. Then we just walked with Sister นก a really cool RC, with an awesome story, and invited people on our way to our dinner apt. I felt happy. Just like I was floating. Honestly, these last 3 days I have just felt like I am floating. Sister Hayes and I just have so much fun, and laugh and are crazy. We are literally the same person. We both just have so much love for the work and people. It's so stereotypical to say, but I honestly haven't felt this good, this consistently for a while. Its just pure bliss right now.

Sister Hayes just gets it. She is an INCREDIBLE missionary, and her testimony is solid. She is also AMAZING at the language. Only 4 months in country and she already speaks better than I do. 555 And you can just tell and see how much she really loves the people. It's contagious. 

I am so blessed to be here right now. I feel like I have already learned and grown so much. I have made a goal to try and fully consecrate myself till the end of my mission, no more worrying about things I can't control, no more worrying about the future, no more dwelling in the past. It's all about the eternal perspective, and what I can do RIGHT NOW to become who Christ needs me to become. I have never been so happy. I love getting lost in the work. Sister Hayes and I are just glowing with happiness! 555 I just feel so happy! <3 

Sister Burbank

In Bankok

New Comp- Sister Hayes from Rexburg

Stake Sports day

Our permanent hotel room for now 

Saying good bye to Sisaket people

It's incredible because some how the gospel just keeps getting deeper and deeper for me.

So emailing got moved to today! Since we will be in Bangkok on Saturday to see Elder Holland, and we won't be having P-day next Monday. So President gave permission to email today in our areas. 

Not a lot to report, since I feel like I literally just emailed, but these last couple days were pretty good. I can't believe we are leaving tomorrow morning to see Elder Holland!! I am staying in Thonburi with Rina, since we have to stay in Bangkok for a couple nights, so that should be fun. Sister Sihabut is excited to go too! She wants to meet the Burmese Sister so it worked out great. Slowly I feel like I have been saying goodbye to the members here. Everyone keeps asking me when I am moving. It's kind of depressing, but its time. I am really going to miss it though. 

We have this one investigator right now, Sister Cookie, she is 17 years old and just the cutest thing ever. I have she came to church on her own last Sunday and this week we have been calling her to follow up on her commitments and she has kept all the commitments so far. I just can't believe how solid she is. She is what it means to find the elect. Her understanding comes so fast, and honestly I wish every investigator would have the desire she has. It will be sad not to see how things work out for her, but I am grateful I got to at least see the beginning of her conversion. I really hope Sister Sihabut stays to continue teach her. She's great.

If you are curious. Here is the list of scriptures that we were given by President to prepare for Elder Holland.

Here is the email President sent us:

While I was in the MTC, Elder Holland provided a list titled, "Twenty Teachings in the Book of Mormon on the Atonement of Jesus Christ, by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland."

Given Elder Holland's passion for the Atonement and for the Book of Mormon, I believe this listing is a great source of study as we prepare to be taught by Elder Holland. Please read the references provided and discuss the concepts in Companionship Study.

1. Nephi's record of the "God of Nature" suffering and the first of Isaiah's testimonies of the Messiah (1 Nephi 19, 21)

2. Lehi's patriarchal blessing and discourse (2 Nephi 2)

3. Jacob's two-day sermon (2 Nephi 6-9)

4. Nephi's final testimony on the doctrine of Christ (2 Nephi 31-33)

5. Jacob's "few words" (Jacob 4)

6. King Benjamin's sermon (Mosiah 2-5)

7. Abinadi's declaration before King Noah, including Isaiah's prophetic testimony (Mosiah 14-16)

8. Alma's testimony to the Church in Gideon (Alma 7)

9. Alma's and Amulek's teaching to Zeezrom (Alma 11-12)

10. Amulek's discourse to the Zoramites (Alma 34)

11. Alma's counsel to his son Corianton (Alma 39-42)

12. Samuel the Lamanite's prophecy (Helaman 14)

13. Jesus's introductory discourse to the Nephites (3 Nephi 11)

14. Jesus's definition of "My Gospel" (3 Nephi 27)

15. Moroni's call to believe in Christ (Mormon 9)

16. Jesus's own pre-mortal testimony (Ether 3-4)

17. Moroni's message to the world on faith, hope and charity (Ether 12)

18. Moroni's summary of his father's teachings on faith, hope and charity (Moroni 7)

19. Mormon's epistle to Moroni regarding little children (Moroni 8)

20. Moroni's invitation to come unto Christ (Moroni 10)

I laughed because it is like half the Book of Mormon. But this is essentially what I have been studying every morning the last month. Honestly, it has been really cool to read all these scriptures of the Atonement back to back. It really strengthened my testimony on just how perfect the Book of Mormon is. All of these scriptures support each other and everything just fits together so perfectly. There is no way someone could make all this up. I honestly just love the Book of Mormon so much. I can't even explain it. I feel like every time I read it my understanding about the depth of the gospel increases. It's incredible because some how the gospel just keeps getting deeper and deeper for me. I NEVER could have imagined before my mission just how deep things really got. And I can't even explain what I mean either. It's something that you have to learn and feel on your own. "Working out your own salvation" kind of thing. SO GOOD FOR REAL! 

I hope everyone has a great week! I know I will be! :)

Love, 

Sister Burbank

LITERALLY. Planted rice this morning. And Elder Holland Coming to Thailand!

LITERALLY. Planted rice this morning. I am officially in the coolest mission in the entire world.

AND no crabs bit me. Miracle #2.

I feel like the longer I am here, the more I just feel like a khon Thai. But then I slave out in the rice fields all day and get totally sunburned and remember I am still that crazy redheaded Canadian born America raised white girl. The best part is that even though I feel completely burnt to a crisp. I am happy.

This week was wonderful. Kind of weird to be honest and FLEW by. But I enjoyed it a lot. We taught prayer a lot this week because believe it or not we got not one but two new investigators! It reminded me of the amazing gift prayer really is. I have seen my relationship with my Heavenly Father become so strengthened over these last 10 months I can't even explain it. Such a blessing.

So since this weekend we will be in Bangkok to see ELDER HOLLAND! So excited. And then the next Thursday after that is Transfers, so yesterday was most likely my last Sunday in Sisaket. Since the chances of me moving are pretty high. 6 months!! I have been in this one area for 1/3rd of my entire mission. So crazy to think. But I honestly got kind of emotional while I was sitting on the stand conducting the music. So much has happened these last 6 months here and I realized how much I really do love these people. It will be good to leave and get a fresh start in another area. But I really do feel like a part of me will always long to be in Sisaket. I am excited to see where I go though! Bangkok????? Probably. 

Anyways, P-day is changed to Saturday this next week (or Friday for you guys) because we will be in Bangkok Sat afternoon after the meeting with Elder Holland with nothing to do until the meeting on Sunday. So, all 180ish missionaries in the entire mission are going to be having p-day together in Bangkok. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. 555 But it will be cool to see everyone together. I want a copy of that picture for sure.

Just a quick thought from my personal study this last week. I spent some time studying D&C 4. You know the section that every missionary in the entire existence of forever has to memorize. I have read it and recited it so many times, but I don't feel like I have really internalized it for a while. But this last week verse 3 and 5 really stuck out to me.

3 "Therefore, if ye have desires to serve God ye are called to the work;"

5 "And faith, hope, charity, and love, with an eye single to the glory of God, qualify him for the work." 

I realized that it is our desire that calls us, but it is our NATURE that qualifies us for the work. It is not just a change in behavior to be faithful or have hope or have charity and love. Or to have an eye single to the glory of God, but it is quite literally a change of nature that we have to undergo to become qualified for His work. At first, a desire is sufficient because everything has to start with our desire first, but after that God expects us to qualify for His work by BECOMING. Becoming like His Son, our Savior, Jesus Christ. So cool, no? 

Everything comes back to PMG Ch. 6 - Christ-like Attributes 

Can't wait to see what Elder Holland has to say on Saturday! Hope everyone has a great week.

Love,

Sister Burbank 

We are on a sleeper Train to Bangkok

Place we planted rice

Our meal after planting rice.

"It will all be worth it!"

D&C 59:23 - "But learn that he who doeth the works of righteousness shall receive his reward, even peace in this world, and eternal life in the world to come."

Peace in this world....probably the most sought after feeling in times of self-doubt and inadequacy.

This week I changed what I asked for in my prayers. I stopped asking for a way to overcome my struggles, but instead I just prayed for patience. I finally applied what my head always knew, and let it touch my heart. I felt peace.

Something I learned this week is that when God asks us to be patient. He doesn't ask us to be patient alone. But instead He comforts us with that peace that only He can give. (John 14:27)

Alma 26:27 - "Now when our hearts were depressed, and we were about to turn back, behold, the Lord comforted us, and said: Go amongst thy brethren, the Lamanites, and bare with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success."

I think I finally understand this scripture. I've read it so many times I can't even count but I don't think I truly understood the magnificence of it until this last week. It's when you finally come out of the darkness of depression that you can truly recognize the hand of God in your life. When you finally FEEL what comfort from God feels like is when your testimony is strengthen. 

This last week the AP's asked us to email in one miracle we saw from the month of July. This is what I chose to write:

I have been on my mission for almost 10 months now and I can honestly say that the month of July has been the most miraculous of them all. However, not for the reason you might think because for the first time in my entire mission I have gone through an entire month and not even found/received one new investigator. Literally zero. Which is not a reflection of me and my companions efforts. Trust me. Now you might be questioning what is so miraculous about that. Well, I guess saying I received literally zero new investigators is a little dramatic. The truth is I did receive one. But she came in the form of an amazingly humble shy recent convert of 2 years from the country of Laos. Yes, she is my companion. This last month has been one of the hardest of my mission, but something I realized is that training one of God's missionaries is one of the greatest experience you can have. I learned that I had taken for granted how blessed I was to have grown up in the gospel. Having the influence of my parents shape my moral. While my companion had no such thing. She did not have the same upbringing I did and just the fact that she found the gospel is a miracle in and of itself. I love her with all of my heart, and her influence on me will be everlasting. She is my miracle, my one investigator, my greatest joy! Seeing her progress and understanding of the gospel increase has brought me more happiness than I can even express. God is truly aware of all of us. As His children He knows our individual needs. And this month, He knew that the struggles I would face would truly shape me into the person He desires for me to become. "It will all be worth it!" 

It was immediately after I wrote this out to send on Friday that my perspective changed. I felt myself finally come out of the darkness I was in and felt that healing of the soul. I realized that it is in the moments that I bare my testimony that I feel the most peace. But since we had had so many little changes to teach this last month, I felt lost and dark. What a realized is that investigators aren't the only person I can bare my testimony too. And actually they shouldn't be the only ones. I should bare my testimony to EVERYONE. Especially my companion. I finally let go of my pride and tried to open up to my companion, no matter how insecure I felt in the language. I realized that when I finally relaxed and stopped trying to speak to just speak, but to speak from my heart the words came. I realized that I can actually speak this language. Not very well, and not very pretty. But enough. Enough that the spirit can carry the message to the hearts of the people I speak to. I've learned to speak from the heart in English, but I realized how much I lacked humility in speaking from the heart in Thai. But now, I feel at peace. I feel at peace with the vulnerability. With the innocence. With the fluency of my speak. But most of all I feel at peace with the trust I have developed in God. 

This week is just the beginning. I finally let go. 

This work is in His hands.

So until next week!! When I will probably have a complete meltdown again and start all over, learning the same lesson I just learned. 555

Love,

Sister Burbank 

Spiritual confidence increases when you accept that 'often trials and tribulations are allowed to come into your life because of what you are doing right.'

STILL HERE - Transfer #4 in Sisaket

....which means we didn't go to Bangkok this week. We just stayed in Sisaket and got destroyed by a huge rain storm. 5555

Literally never been so wet in my life. Got to love biking areas. It has rained pretty much every day this week. And on Saturday night the power in our house went out which also meant we have no water either. Luckily after calling around we found someone to come fix it. Apparently, there was literally just a switch you had to flip and everything would work again. Unfortunately, we didn't know that so for 45 minutes we just sat in the dark. 

Also, on Saturday though was Sister กิกส birthday so we took her out to lunch. Just literally ate a bunch of ส้มตำ which I love, so that was fun. 

We got a new District Leader! Elder Howard. He is from Lehi, Utah and is from Sister Ong's MTC group. So he is just about to pass his year mark on the mission. I think he will be great for Sisaket. 

Other than that, this week has been pretty low key. Just inviting a lot and teaching. We are working on finding new investigators. Right now, we are teaching Sister Joy. She is the mom of a member here, and she is so cute. She is in her 40s but we kind of have to teach her like a child because within the last 20 years something has happened to her mentally and so she has to take a lot of pills to help cope. Because I can't speak doctor Thai, I actually have no idea what it is, but all I know is that she is so cute. She loves singing Hymns and praying. So we do a lot of that when we go visit her. 555 I literally just can't explain to you how much I love her, and watching Sister Sihabut work with her too is so cool for me. 

It's moments like that, that make being a missionary so worth it! 

Quote of the week: "Spiritual confidence increases when you accept that 'often trials and tribulations are allowed to come into your life because of what you are doing right."' (Elder Klebingat G.C. Oct. 2014)

Read this talk this morning during personal study. I finished reading all of Apr. 2015 conference talks, so I started reading Oct. 2014 again. This talk just happened to be the one I read today and it really was a tender mercy for me. I highly recommend reading it. 

I hope you all have a great week.

Love you! 

Sister Burbank